In 2010, human rights reporter Mac McClelland went to Haiti to cover the lingering devastation of the earthquake. Back home, McClelland finds herself imagining vivid scenes of violence. She can’t sleep or stop crying. It becomes clear that she is suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder after witnessing the epidemic of rape in that country and nearly suffering a rape herself.  This unfortunately (fortunately?) coincided with her meeting and making an immediate connection with a French gendarme named Nico, sent there as a UN peacekeeper.

This book is the result of an exhaustive, and exhausting, exploration of the condition we commonly associate with combat veterans.  The author makes clear that trauma is trauma no matter what form it takes, and that if it is left unresolved, can result in this psychologically and physically devastating illness.  It is a miracle that the author survived the sadness, dissociation, self-loathing, and violent fantasies to write this book.  That miracle was Nico, who was her lifeline, the man she wanted, whose love motivated her to seek healing rather than victimhood or death.